Put Your Hands Up!!!

Congrats to the USTA Cedardale women who defeated Newburyport this week, the number one ranked team in the league!!!  Taking both singles courts and one doubles, we brought in a much needed team win.  And, oh, are there are plenty of detes to share.  You just know there's going to be a smackdown that rivals caged wrestling and mixed martial arts when the opposing captain interrupts OUR captain's pre-drink spectating with irrelevant paperwork issues.  And who shares their individual and team record with their opponent in the bathroom??? Like WE don't have access to the interweb or the twitters?!? Going mano y mano, these captains squared off on the singles court, and Shawn took the first set at 6-4.  In the second set and an hour and a half later, Shawn led by two and called time.  The other captain called cheating and undermining. Concerned with a misunderstanding, Cap'n consulted the USTA regs before walking in the direction of the bar with her racket and the W.  I pulled in the second team point winning on the singles court in straight sets, 6-1, 6-4.  Leslie and Kristine delivered the doubles win after a dismal first set, and while Cap'n and Coach Sharon seem to think that their spectating amped up the ladies' energy, we all know what motivated them to dominate the next five games. Since this blog has a PG-13 rating, I'll not say another word.  

On another note, Jules has recently been inducted into the juicing camp alongside Cap'n, Betsey, and 4.5. While I don't want to be a killjoy, especially after Betsey claimed that she could "smell the beach" after ingesting liquid crack, I am compelled to inform y'all that synthetic taurine has been banned by the governments of Denmark, France, Norway, and the NCAA.  While France lifted their ban in recent years (can they EVER take a stand??), scientific reports exist of chickens plucking themselves to death while under the influence.  Let me say this:  If I see ONE mark on any of your arms or legs, there WILL BE an intervention. Hope you like Winehouse's tunes - she may well be your future roommate.